Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Little Nothings

Almost every single day Manly and I will be talking - about nothingness. Just the run of words that comes from living under the same roof for a very long time. He'll say something silly, and I'll come back with a comment, and it'll go on for awhile. It's the kind of talk that I think goes on in most kitchens, or when we're lying there in the dark with the covers pulled up under our chins, across the world, on any given night, and even if the circumstances look a bit different, and the languages would sound odd to me, the conversation is still the same.

At the time we're dancing back and forth over some silly something, I'll think - 'I have to remember this moment'. Then the next minute, or hour, or morning it's completely gone, and I can't remember what we were even talking about, let alone a single line of what we said, even though at the time it was wildly amusing to me, or Manly.

I can't usually recall what we said, or what it was about, but that comfort lingers - knowing your words are safe with another certain person, that they'll laugh at your silly jokes, banter back and forth with you, and you'll feel safe with each other, safe enough to just be yourself.

Those who have this going on under roofs, or covers, at night know what I'm talking about - and are thankful for it too. Better than an expensive dinner out in dress up clothes, better than cruises and exotic trips, or romantic picnics spread on a blanket by the lake, better than all those things we say we're going to do and never get to, knowing for however long God gives us, he'll say silly things and I'll laugh and bounce back with something so he knows I get it, and it's not even so much what we're saying, but what we're not, what we don't need to, that fills us up for another day.

10 comments:

Becky said...

You hit it on the head. Some days I regret that I feel like we are just roommates,with the hustle and bustle and busy-ness of life. Other days I am glad that we are. Comfort is a good thing when you need and want to feel "safe" as you said.

I love Billy's definition (found on the internet somewhere) of love.

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.” Billy - age 4

I have always thought of this as the way God must call my name. I always feel safe with Him, even when He is calling me to do something difficult.

But I think it certainly goes with marriage for sure. God with skin on so to speak :)

Thanks Bev, this was great.

Kelly said...

So true, and the real beauty of marriage, that unique language only two share. I truly believe the laughter we share is the glue that holds us together, and one of the best parts of my life.

As a newlywed I loved the realization that every night we got to have a "sleepover" and laugh as much as we want at the end of the day sillies. (We tend to get punchier as the evening wears on). I don't know that Rusty quite gets my analogy of marriage being like a slumber party, but he still laughs with me at only those things we "get".

Bev said...

I love that analogy Kelly, "sleepovers every night" - perfect. And it can continue on into the morning, in our jammies with bedhead too.

The Vinson Five said...

I love this post! It is so true...

Judith said...

I think this closeness has to do with really hearing the other person, one of the most loving things we can do, and the silly jokes you share are just frosting on the wedding cake, and you two have certainly earned it.

Gretchen said...

And that is why I miss my hubby right now. The silly thing is, I'm thankful for missing him (not in all ways, but in this way) because it means that we are still bestest of friends. With benefits.

Linds said...

Ah yes....and this is what you miss the most, you know. The little things. So cherish every moment, Bev.

Linda said...

After forty-two years I know exactly what you mean and couldn't have said it better. Sometimes all it takes is a look and I laugh knowing exactly what he's thinking. It's good stuff.

pcb said...

So thoughtful. Thanks.

Renna said...

What a sweet post. Studley and I do that, too, until it's time for each of us to put in our bite guards and ear plugs and go to sleep. ;-)