Grandmotherly Chats and Kisses

After breakfast at a local place this past Sunday I stopped in the ladies room. Coming out of the stall I heard someone talking in a fussing sort of way. As I approached the sink, there was only one old woman standing there, with her cane taking up the entire counter. She was 'dressed up' for church in that way old ladies do, and frustrated that she'd gotten ketchup on her bright blue scarf. Her fluffs of wavy white hair had not visited the beauty parlor in awhile, and her face hung loose and low as she stood there looking down at the spot.

As she continued to dab and rub and douse she asked me if I thought it was a good idea to do so. Would it just make the stain set in more? I told her probably cold water was a good idea, that ketchup is hard to get out but maybe if she put some stain stuff on it as soon as she got home, while it was still wet, it would come out okay. I smiled and said goodbye, then walked out and headed back to my table.

I remembered a stain removal stick in my purse, so I grabbed it and went back to the ladies room, walked up to her and began to work on the stain on her scarf that was now pretty wet. I told her I thought this might help, and hoped it would come out clean when she got home. As I dabbed away, I noticed her pale blue eyes. Probably years ago, when they were brighter she didn't need to wear blue to bring them out but the years had faded any color from her face.

I put the cap on the stick, and before I knew what happened, she grabbed my face between both her hands and pulled me to her, gave me the biggest, smooshy in a grandmotherly way, kiss on my cheek. She said, "there are still nice people out there. Thank you, honey." I told her she was quite welcome and went on my way, tickled at the political uncorrectness of it all, kissing a complete stranger, in a less than spotless bathroom.

Yesterday I was at the local Goodwill looking for treasures. While I did find TWO pairs of capris, and two white coffee mugs that are perfect for an afternoon latte, I also picked up several Disney movies for the grandkids to enjoy when they come to visit. Standing there with my head crooked sideways, an old woman wandered up, and started looking at the movies with me. She began to give me a running commentary on which ones were good, had I seen them, etc. etc. I sensed that maybe she just needed someone to talk to.

It made me think back to a time when the Welcome Wagon lady showed up at our door, and I talked her ears off before bursting into a blubbery mess. That poor woman! It was a time when we'd just moved, and I was home with three small children while Don was busy working 7 days a week. I just needed someone to talk to who was over ten years old.

The white haired woman spoke, "do you like John Wayne?"

I wondered, do I look like a girl who would like JW? I said, 'well, actually, yes I do. And my son really likes him.' She handed me an old VCR movie and told me it was JW's best movie ever and I should watch it. Which meant I should buy it.

Then she added 'if you don't like it, you can come back and give me a kick or two.'

I assured her I would not be doing that, but took the movie from her hands and added it to my pile of purchases. She told me she comes there to find movies for her great-grandkids, and that she'd get down on the floor to look at the movies on the lower shelves but she wasn't sure she'd ever get up again. So we commiserated about low shelves and crummy knees a bit, talked about grandchildren, and good bargains too.

Both run-ins were completely delicious. I don't know whose grandmother either of them might be, but hope they are treasured. I wondered if either gets lonely, needs a bit more conversation with another human on a daily basis, maybe most days feel like too much to get through before night falls and they sit down to supper alone. After Don's father died, his mother said supper alone was the hardest part to get used to. Many nights she'd just heat up a little something to avoid having to sit down at the table by herself.

Days later I'm still turning both visits over in my mind, feeling blessed to have run into each of them. I came away with a lot more than a hot breakfast and some capris, mugs and movies.